I Don't Know

I hesitated making this entry because I’m not in the right frame of mind to make it.  It’s not pleasant to read or experience firsthand but this is part of my journey, so here goes.  After a 5 hour training ride, I had developed an irritation in the perianal area that quickly festered into a full-blown infection.  The abscess daily swelled in size, causing an extreme amount of pressure and pain.  I couldn’t take it anymore and finally went to the ER.  After his examination, he decided not to drain it because of the risks involved.  That meant finding a specialist which took another two days.  You know it’s bad when you can impress the doctor.  After an uncomfortable examination and an excruciatingly painful procedure, he said, “Wow!  That was a lot of fluid.”

No kidding!  And the news kept getting worse.  “It could come back, I don’t know.  Getting back on your bike should be at least two weeks, I don’t know.  The anti-biotics might clear it up, I don’t know.”  After my follow-up visit, the doc said it was healing fine but I still feel a knot.  Could be that he didn’t get it all.  Could be another one forming.  Could be scar tissue.  I don’t know and it’s driving me crazy!  Again, no help from the medical expert who kept repeating, “Hey, there will be more triathlons in your life.”

 
IMAZ is only 5 weeks away and my friends keep trying to encourage me about the mental side of training and racing.  Unless this all turns into a health risk type of thing, I’m still planning on going to Arizona.  I may have to find a miniature donut to use on the bike.  I may have to walk the marathon like a duck.  Or God may have other plans entirely.  I don’t know.  That’s why I’m trying to be content with Jesus’ words, “Let tomorrow worry about itself, each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34)

Don't You Quit

I finished my very first half IM!  Everything was perfect for Redman Triathlon in Oklahoma City; weather, pacing, volunteers, nutrition, and finish!  Well, not everything went perfectly but I’m not complaining; I finished!  I did this race to prepare for the goal in Arizona and I learned some valuable lessons.  I had everything written out, double checked, and even printed on places to remind me.  The swim was calm and relaxed and right on target.  The bike was hilly but I never varied from the heart rate plan and I felt strong.  In the previous two shorter races I did, I bonked on the 6 mile run course.  Not this time!  I was flying through my first 6 miles of this 13.1 course.

Then I hit mile 7.  That’s when the wheels came off.  I had rehearsed my race day nutrition and I was following it perfectly until the run.  I knew I was behind on my caloric intake but I pressed on.  One of my favorite signs on the run was, “Your mind is telling your body to stop but your body is telling your mind to SHUT UP!”  It made me laugh and my legs were screaming.  I had to walk more than usual but I’ve learned to swallow my pride as a triathlete.  I tried to compensate by drinking the Gatorade at the aid stations but that upset my stomach.  I know, I know, never race with what you don’t train with.  I told you I learned some lessons.

Then, with 3 miles to go, as I was walking, two guys in street clothes, who were members of our tri4Him organization, encouraged me with these words, “Your savior carried His cross with every last step, and even when He fell on His knees, He kept going…for you; so don’t you quit!”  So, here’s my encouragement to you; when you’re out of gas, down on your luck, crippled with anxiety, or paralyzed by fear, keep moving forward!  Eventually the finish line will appear. 

Focus

Well, the month of August was a slightly better month.  I probably need to be updating this blog thing more often.  Spent some major bucks at Koala Chiropractic after a wakeboarding wipeout.  Before strapping on the board, the $600+ nonrefundable IM entry fee flashed before my eyes and common sense took a back seat.  After 3 weeks of therapy, x-rays, e-stem, massage, and ice, it turns out to be a strained, possibly torn tendon.  

Rest was the prescription but once again, I didn’t listen.  At least I did my runs on a treadmill or track for softer pounding.  Had to get new shoes too because my plantar fasciitis was acting up.  I’m only training around 10 hours a week but that doesn’t account for all the hours of stretching, icing, weight workouts, and foam rolling.  It’s crazy!  My warm-ups and cool-downs seem to take forever!

Add to all of that my learning curve and this is a full-time job.  My nutrition on and off workouts have been defined and redefined again and again; constant practice.  I completed an Olympic distance this past weekend and was 15 minutes slower than my last race.  Normally I would be discouraged about it but I’m focused on Arizona; everything else is practice.  Plus, it was brutally hot!  So, there is my lesson for the month; keep your eyes on the goal and work through all the distractions.  However, as of today, I don’t think I’m gonna sign up for another race anytime soon.

Incentive

The month of July was a particularly rough month.  My resolve and my faith are being tested.  Mechanical failures on the bike.  A two-flat day on a 3 hour ride.  Emotional roller-coaster rides in important relationships.  Injury.  Bad eating.  Missed workouts.  Job stress.  Summer colds.  I could go on and on because I am good at focusing on half empty glasses.  At least I recognize it, which is the first step in overcoming it.  Still, I am desperately searching for some incentive.

As my training load increases, I am constantly creating negative energy with serious doubts that I can accomplish my goal.  I suppose it stems from everything else happening in my life; it all seems connected.  There is so much to “fix” that I get overwhelmed, which doesn’t help the spiral effect.  So, I have a choice; I can quit or press on.  Neither choice appeals to me at the moment, but I have decided the press on.  I will do what I can; stick to the plan; adapt; and overcome.  In effect, I need to create incentive by increasing the good things and eliminating the bad ones; one thing and one day at a time.

If I fail, then so be it.  One thing is for sure.  Failure is an event, not a person.  The only real failure is in giving up.  Who knows where this road will lead.  At least it’s better than sitting on the couch wallowing in self-pity.  Let’s see what the month of August brings…

Ice Baths

Talk about pain!  I've read about the benefits of ice baths and even took a few years ago when training for a marathon.  Now I remember why I don't like them.  They hurt, but only for the first couple of minutes.  Once the numbness sets in, it's not so bad and the soak only lasts for 10 minutes.  My coach suggested I get back into the ice bath habit because it's one of the best ways to flush out lactic acid buildup. 

My next one will be different though.  Instead of dumping 4 large bags in the water and crawling in, I will get in the water first before adding the ice.  The shock was incredibly painful all at once.  I loved the feeling afterward though; the blood vessels opening up and flushing out the toxins.  Apparently, this speeds up the recovery period after a long 3 hour bike ride and 30 minute brick run.  Anything that helps, I'm game for trying.

Now if I could just have that attitude in life.  We all would rather avoid pain but sometimes the pain of one thing is worth the greater good of another.  It makes enduring momentary affliction more palatable, as noted by the Apostle Paul in 2 Corinthians 4:17, "For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory..."  It's not that I like pain.  It would be so much easier if life added pain "one cube at a time;" but if I know there is a benefit, I don't have to dwell on the temporary. 

Thank You Ronnie!

A couple of Saturday's ago, I joined my training group on a long bike ride.  As a youth minister, my schedule gets really busy during the summer months, so I was commenting to a fellow rider on different strategies to complete my prescribed workouts during hectic times.  He told me not to stress about it because my ministry as a husband, dad, and minister will always be more important than my training.  I needed that reminder.  Thank you Ronnie!

Something else happened on that ride that taught me the importance of working out with partners.  My friend had already completed his training for that day, so he was just going along for the ride with us.  I had several threshold repeats to perform, so he stayed right by my side throughout the workout.  He kept me on the right cadence and heart-rate zone the whole time, which meant telling me when to shift, when to push harder, and when to relax.  I had a computer that told me the same information but it's different when your computer has skin on.  Thank you Ronnie!

Truth be told, when I am by myself, I tend not to push as hard as with others.  There is no encouragement to hang on, keep going, don't let up, good job, way to go, almost there, etc.  The teens I work with always tell me their faith walk would be easier if God had skin on; someone they could actually see in person.  Could it be that God shows Himself through others?  No doubt.  Thank you Ronnie!